Etiquette and Approach: Why Swiming Up to a Superyacht with Wine is a Bad Idea

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to approach a superyacht with a bottle of wine and introduce yourself?

The Real Story Behind the Villainous Approach

Someone tried that, and I asked her to leave before I alerted on board security. Approaching a vessel by swimming in water shows a distinct lack of etiquette, and in most cases, will be seen as an attempt to board. This is not a recommended method, and no one with an iota of sense wants somebody of unknown origin aboard a vessel. Yachts are floating castles, and the owners don't own these things because they want everyone to board; they are private places, and their security is taken extremely seriously.

The Responsibility of Yacht Boarding

Let's say a sexy stranger decided to swim up with a bottle of wine and is invited aboard. That's another responsibility on the boat for the captain, crew, and owner. If that sexy stranger decides to bump their head somewhere or slip and fall and decide to go legal, you are now on the hook. This is just one of the reasons why it's important to approach a superyacht correctly.

Proper Approach Strategies

To approach a superyacht properly, look for the owner or captain. Wave, and if they feel comfortable enough, they will invite you. They will either use their tender to pick you up from your boat or allow you to approach with your tender. Ensure that you are fully visible at all times and approach at a moderate speed. Upon approaching, ask for permission to come aboard. Make sure to throw your tie-up line and step aboard with the wine or champagne in hand. Place the label front directly under your wrist for a smooth hand-off. This way, people will see the label, not just the price. Proper presentation is key.

Consequences and Expectations

People in big boats really do talk to people in other boats, even smaller ones. Yacht owners and crew are not isolationists but they are very weary and more intelligent than the average person. If you present yourself correctly, you have a better chance of getting invited for a Puu Puus (a type of conversation) and the wine, of course. If you are not too likable but the wine is really great, and I mean outstanding, you may get invited to uncork the wine.

However, if you backfire, anything else including errors on your part about what constitutes a really good bottle of wine, or if you approach in the wrong manner, you may be told to bear off, otherwise known as 'shove off.'

Etiquette and approach are crucial when it comes to interacting with superyachts. By presenting yourself properly and understanding the rules of the game, you can increase your chances of a successful and enjoyable interaction.